A girl on a journey to become healthy!
I hit a high of 270.8lbs in January 2010, and it wasn't until our family put together a weight-loss competition that I was able to find the motivation to get healthy. I lost a total of 53.8lbs during the competition and ended at a weight of 217lbs. This is when I began to struggle.
After the competition I continued on my journey to get healthy on and off, but I seemed to fluctuate much more than I had intended to. Truth be told, these fluctuations are what lead to my sporadic disappearances from my YouTube channel. I abandoned my viewers and subscribers out of shame, embarrassment, and fear of disappointing them.
I guess I failed to remember that I have the most unbelievably supportive viewers on the planet who have never, not even for a moment, made me feel anything but great about myself and have been an incredible support system for me throughout my journey to become healthy.
When you share such a personal part of yourself with the world, sometimes it's hard to remember that you're still only human. I'm not perfect. I'm going to make mistakes. I will have times when I falter. Sometimes, I am going to fall down...What I need to work on now is realizing that even if I fall, I have over a thousand awesome people who are there to help pick me back up! I should be embracing that kind of support, not running away from it.
So from here on out, no more smoke and mirrors. Mistakes or not, I will lay it all out to be seen. It has been wonderful to hear that I have inspired people, but what I strive for now is the courage not to run away. I want to be healthy, and without mistakes, we can't learn. So here we go....