Yesterday was the first day since January that I woke up with the feeling that I have been chasing after for 5 months. The feeling that I'm ready. I. AM. READY.
I'm sure most of you know exactly what I am talking about. That feeling when your mind goes clear of all the clouds of doubt and weakness, and you find your drive. All the things that were able to hold you back seem to vanish. I found my drive and I'm embracing it.
Like I mentioned, I have gained some weight since my cruise in January, and never got it back off. I've been maintaining unhealthy eating habits ever since... and even though I haven't gained any more weight since the cruise, I've been just hovering around the same weight for so long. I'd go days of dieting, and then a couple days of eating horrible, rinse and repeat. Every time I'd try to diet, I was never really "in it". My mind wasn't there. My drive wasn't there. All I kept thinking about was all the sweet treats I wanted to eat... Ice cream, M&Ms, just junk! So because those thoughts were always in my head, my healthy eating would last three days tops before I would plummet back off track.
Well, yesterday was different. It was so different that I felt like I had to come back here. I found my spark again! I'm ready to do what I have to do. I'm not quite sure where this feeling came from, or what I did to achieve it... but I'm holding onto it and I'm not letting go! Time to start back where I left off and complete my goals! I feel like I have more motivation than ever. I'm getting married next July and we want to start having babies :) I'm not going to let my weight to be a wrench in the gears of my happiest life moments! I've got this bull by the horns now!